Introduction: The Art of Making Instant Connections
In How to Make People Like You in 90 Seconds or Less, Nicholas Boothman provides a practical guide to forming quick, genuine connections with others. He emphasizes the importance of first impressions, body language, and rapport-building techniques to establish trust and likability in personal and professional interactions. Boothman draws on principles of neuro-linguistic programming (NLP) to teach readers how to make meaningful connections within seconds.
First impressions are formed in the blink of an eye, but their impact can last a lifetime.
~ Nicholas Boothman
Part 1: The Power of First Impressions
Boothman explains that people form judgments about others within seconds of meeting them. He stresses the importance of appearing approachable, confident, and positive during initial encounters.
Key Lessons:
- Make eye contact to show attentiveness and sincerity.
- Smile genuinely to create warmth and trust.
- Use an open posture to convey confidence and openness.
A genuine smile is the universal welcome.
~ Nicholas Boothman
Part 2: Establishing Rapport Quickly
Rapport is the foundation of all relationships, and Boothman explains how to build it quickly using mirroring techniques and shared experiences.
Key Lessons:
- Mirroring Body Language: Subtly reflect the other person’s posture, gestures, and tone to create subconscious connection.
- Find Common Ground: Look for shared interests, experiences, or values to build a bond.
- Listen Actively: Focus on the speaker and show genuine curiosity about what they’re saying.
Rapport is built on trust, and trust starts with empathy.
~ Nicholas Boothman
Part 3: The Role of Body Language
Boothman highlights that body language accounts for over 55% of communication. He teaches readers how to use nonverbal cues to express warmth, confidence, and interest.
Key Lessons:
- Stand tall and maintain an open posture to appear confident and approachable.
- Use gestures to emphasize points without overwhelming the conversation.
- Pay attention to subtle cues like leaning in to show interest.
People may forget what you said, but they’ll never forget how you made them feel.
~ Nicholas Boothman
Part 4: The Magic of Eye Contact
Eye contact is one of the most powerful tools for creating connection. Boothman explains that sustained eye contact conveys sincerity, focus, and trustworthiness.
Key Lessons:
- Maintain eye contact for just the right amount of time—long enough to show interest but not so long that it feels intrusive.
- Use eye contact to show attentiveness when listening.
- Match the intensity of eye contact based on the context—softer for casual conversations and stronger for professional settings.
The eyes are the windows to the soul, but they’re also the key to connection.
~ Nicholas Boothman
Part 5: The Importance of Voice and Tone
Boothman discusses how voice plays a crucial role in communication, influencing how words are perceived. He highlights that tone, pace, and pitch can dramatically impact likability.
Key Lessons:
- Speak with warmth and enthusiasm to make conversations inviting.
- Match the pace and tone of the other person to build rapport.
- Use pauses to emphasize points and create engagement.
It’s not what you say but how you say it that creates impact.
~ Nicholas Boothman
Part 6: The Art of Compliments and Conversation
Boothman stresses the importance of making others feel valued through genuine compliments and meaningful conversation.
Key Lessons:
- Offer compliments that are specific and sincere rather than generic.
- Ask open-ended questions to encourage deeper conversations.
- Focus on the other person’s interests and passions to make interactions memorable.
Everyone’s favorite topic is themselves—let them talk about it.
~ Nicholas Boothman
Part 7: Reading People and Building Trust
Boothman explains how to observe subtle cues like facial expressions and micro-movements to gauge emotions and reactions. Trust is built by showing empathy and consistency.
Key Lessons:
- Pay attention to the other person’s comfort level and adjust your approach if needed.
- Be authentic and consistent in your behavior to build trust over time.
- Mirror emotions to show understanding and empathy.
Trust is earned when actions and words align.
~ Nicholas Boothman
Part 8: Adapting to Different Personality Types
Boothman introduces strategies for identifying and adapting to different personality types, ensuring smoother communication and stronger connections.
Key Lessons:
- Analytical Types: Provide facts and logic to appeal to their rational side.
- Expressive Types: Focus on emotions and creativity to connect with their enthusiasm.
- Amiable Types: Be warm and friendly, prioritizing relationships over tasks.
- Drivers: Be direct and focused, respecting their need for efficiency.
People are different, and the secret to connection is meeting them where they are.
~ Nicholas Boothman
Part 9: The Role of Humor in Building Connections
Boothman highlights humor as a tool for breaking the ice and easing tension. He advises using lighthearted humor to create bonds without forcing jokes.
Key Lessons:
- Use humor to lighten the mood and reduce social tension.
- Avoid sarcasm or jokes that could be misinterpreted.
- Observe the other person’s humor style and adapt accordingly.
Laughter is the shortest distance between two people.
~ Nicholas Boothman
Part 10: Applying These Skills in Business and Relationships
Boothman explains how these techniques can improve professional networking, job interviews, dating, and friendships. He provides scripts and practical exercises for applying the concepts immediately.
Key Lessons:
- Use introductions to quickly establish rapport.
- Practice conversations to refine delivery and confidence.
- Treat every interaction as an opportunity to build a connection.
Success in business and life depends on your ability to make others feel important.
~ Nicholas Boothman
Key Takeaways
- First Impressions Matter – People form opinions within seconds, so smile, make eye contact, and stand tall.
- Build Rapport Quickly – Mirror body language, find common ground, and listen actively to create connection.
- Use Nonverbal Communication – Pay attention to body language, tone, and facial expressions to strengthen trust.
- Focus on the Other Person – Ask questions, give compliments, and make people feel valued.
- Adapt to Personality Types – Adjust your communication style to match the needs and preferences of others.
- Celebrate Small Wins – Focus on making connections one conversation at a time.
Connection is not about techniques—it’s about making people feel seen and heard.
~ Nicholas Boothman
Conclusion: Make Every Interaction Count
How to Make People Like You in 90 Seconds or Less offers readers a roadmap for building trust and forming meaningful relationships quickly. Whether in professional networking or personal conversations, Boothman’s techniques empower readers to connect confidently and authentically.
In a world where relationships drive success, connection is your greatest asset.
~ Nicholas Boothman


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